Alec and I have been married for 6 months today! I can’t even believe that it’s been that long already. When I was in high school, and adults would tell me that life begins to fly by, and go faster and faster as time goes on, I didn’t believe them. But looking at how quickly the best six months of my life have gone, I’m sure I’ll be sobbing by our first anniversary.
Before we got married, we were told several pieces of advice by people we love and trust. Two that I frequently remember came from two men we knew from Bible school. Butch told me, “You have no idea who you’re marrying,” meaning that we think we know someone well, but in the daily vulnerability of marriage, we understand way more than we had before. And our friend Josh told me, “Go through as much as you can together.” And those two statements ring in my head almost every day.
I know Alec better now than I ever have. I’ve learned a ton of new things about him since being married, like his love for Star Wars and little quirks like how he sings to me by changing the lyrics of songs. Like how he literally IS a morning person, and that’s probably the most talkative he is all day. Like how teachable he really is.
I also have learned so much more about how to respect Alec well, how to listen to his heart well, and what it looks like to time conversations well in light of where we might be at. I’ve not at all mastered these things, but I’ve really loved learning them, and Alec has been incredibly gracious to allow me to learn them. I’ve learned how quickly I can run to assumptions, or to being snappy with him. I’ve seen how often I react, how slow I am to say sorry.
Oh but him. Alec is quick to apologize first, even when I was to blame. He is quick to serve me by washing dishes. He has been quick to work with me as we pack, asking what he should do next. Alec is someone you want in your corner, always. He is my greatest ally and teammate, supporting me in all things. When I don’t write, he pushes me to. When I feel dry, he asks if I’ve had time in the Word lately. When I pitch a creative idea, he hears and works with it. Literally, I could never have done life with anyone else.
We’ve gone through a lot together thus far. A lot of changes, new ideas, revealed hurts and insecurities. But when Alec is struggling, no matter with what, I always remember to go through as much as we can together. That’s how we bolster unity. That’s how we choose each other. That’s how we depend on the Lord, because obviously you can’t go through things together without having to depend on Him for patience, grace, and to listen and take on the hard things.
I’m so thankful to the Lord for giving me Alec as a husband. He knew that I needed him. He knew I needed his spontaneity and his kindness and that he tells me he loves me all the time. He knew I needed his faith when we take next steps, when I would rather walk in place. He knew I needed his tenderness, as he gets on eye level and cries with me. He is the best thing that the Lord has ever gifted me.
So, in six months time, I’ve fallen more in love with my husband than ever before. I have fallen more in love with his quirks and become more his teammate than before. In six months, we adopted a dog, applied to Moody, and are packing up to move to Chicago. In six months, we’ve cried, laughed, fought, made up, served, and loved. Alec is *still* beyond all of my hopes and dreams, and I could never deserve him.
I love you, Alec.
God has been so good to us in marriage. He has provided for us, and always is teaching us how exactly unconditional love looks day to day. He has softened our hearts toward each other, and is causing us to pursue unity, to fight for each other and our marriage. Marriage is hard, the hardest thing we’ve ever done. But it is rich, and real, and rewarding. It’s the best because God made it. Marriage is good because God is good, and God made marriage. So, as a woman who married her dream at 19 years old, I can say with honesty, it has been the best decision I ever made. Growing with Alec is my favorite. He is so good to me, and God is so good to us in it.
Whether we’re here in Jackson, or away in Chicago, or somewhere different, marriage is good. It’s amazing because I’m doing it with Alec, and the Lord is leading us in the joys He has for us. He’s leading us to His heart.
Here’s to six months, and six months more and more until forever, my love.